There is no other tool for connecting to college students and young adults like Facebook (Wikipedia entry & Guardian article) – I don’t fight it, I just work with it.  Gone are the days of paper directories.  Gone are the days of list-serves.  Gone are the days of one person or office gatering up everyone’s information and trying to get it back out before half of it changes.

Facebook has changed the landscape because it allows the individual to manage their own information and connect to people he or she wants to.  People start by joining large networks, but then an individual personalizes it and shapes it as they will – all the while making billions of dollars for Marky Z. because knows we want to stay connected with friends and family in an increasingly busy life-style.

Now, there is a dark side to Facebook.  As I see it, there are three common symptoms that people can develop from over use of this strange, exciting world of social networking: stalking, time warps, and false intimacy.

Stalking:  People put there life out there in such rich detail, its like looking into their home.  Once you “friend” someone, they see everything you’ve put out there – your class schedule, likes, photos, class schedule, and list of phobias – whatever.  I don’t know who’s fault it is – the stalker or the stalkee – but the informality breeds a kind of social voyeurism.

Time Warps:  It can be a common phenomena – logging on to Facebook just to change your status only to discover 2 hours have passed by.  It is so easy to loose track of time trying to keep up with everyone you are friends with, starting new groups, adding photos, or stalking – I mean inviting  – new people to be your friend.

False intimacy:  more than anything, Facebook cannot replace the hard work of actually being a friend in real time.  Sure, you can see what people are doing, look at their virtual bookshelf, or get quick updates – but it can get a person out of practice of being a friend instead of collecting friends.  Friendship can’t be quantified by the number of friends you have – it can only be qualified in ways Facebook or the internet can’t measure (yet).

Go to The Yellow Door facebook group and join in and see who is joining our community here at Central.

Tonight we started a new service called “The Door”.  We had 5 people show up – none of them students from UMKC or Rockhurst.  The good news – everything was ready, we had plenty of pizza, and the room looked great.  At one point, two student-types showed up and walked in the door.  We got excited, but played it cool.  Turns out that they were actually there to start jobs with the janitorial company the church hires to clean the building.

During worship (of course we had it – it’s for an audience of One anyway), I was struck by two conflicting feelings.  The first was disappointment, frustration, and maybe a little bit of rejection – but this didn’t last long.  As we sang and prayed, I was reminded that Central UMC has been content not to engage the college students for more years that I have been alive.  You can’t just stop ignoring a group of people, paint a door yellow, make some snazzy postcards, and expect them to come beating down your door (or do we)?

It’s hard ground, but not impenetrable.  It’s time to get on that campus and start meeting people.  Today is the day we stop ignoring our neighbor and start engaging them.